


Shizuo and the magic wand

by Kajune



Category: Durarara!!
Genre: Defenseless Izaya, Helpless Izaya, Humiliation, Humor, M/M, Magic, Naughty Shizuo, Transformation, Wizard Shizuo
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-18
Updated: 2015-05-01
Packaged: 2018-03-23 14:33:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,285
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3771841
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kajune/pseuds/Kajune
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What happens when Shizuo comes across a magic wand, and uses it on a defenseless Izaya?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Amazing Discovery

**Author's Note:**

  * For [LegendofMajora](https://archiveofourown.org/users/LegendofMajora/gifts).



 Mrs. Heiwajima always taught him to respect animals, to treat them as his friends and family, to be kind and caring and loving also. Shizuo finds doing this to be easier than treating humans nicely, since humans are quite selfish and the kids at school constantly teased him even after he gave them a few bone fractures. His mother's advice on making friends during his childhood proved fruitless, but when it came to animals, Shizuo has long been a true fan of dogs, cats and birds.

Unlike humans, these creatures are easy to understand and don't know how to lie. They make noises but only to gain attention, not to get the hell on his nerves. They are sweet and adorable and come in all shapes and sizes. Though humans do come in a variety of appearances, much of them are a result of excessive fat, expensive clothing or poorly-applied make up.

Shizuo loves animals, has made friends with many. It's easy to love these creatures when they don't judge him over his strength. Of course, he has scared a few, nearly hurt one, but in the end they always come back and allow him to pet them for as long as he wants.

His relationship with animals has never truly gone sour, until one day...

* * *

Every year, money becomes a problem, or more precisely, every other month Shizuo finds himself low on cash despite rarely missing work. He makes sure not to damage too much and cost his company a single penny, yet by the end of each month he feels as though he barely has enough to pay anything but his rent.

During times like these Shizuo will buy cheap buns before work, and return home for a cup of ramen unless he's too tired to cook and instead he will buy another bun. Aside from the occasional stomach rumbles and the lack of sugary treats, these moments don't end up as depressing as one would think.

Today becomes an exception...right when a dog manages to snatch the bag Shizuo was carrying and run off with it. Shizuo becomes furious, and for the first time his rage is directed at a dog. His hands ball into fists, before he begins chasing after the animal, roaring words such as "Damn you!" as they enter the park.

The dog jumps into a bush, and, ignoring the many stares he is receiving, Shizuo plunges half of his body into the leafy area, with the intent of punishing the dog a way he would do a human. Unfortunately, his belief of catching the dog instantly proves false, and as his hands scatter and reach for some fur, something pokes him.

Pulling out, Shizuo initially thinks it's a branch, but finds himself with a strange stick stuck to his head. He takes it out and looks at it. It appears to be a stick made of ice, sharp (and slightly bloody) on one end. At that moment, the dog rears its head from the other end of the bush, looking rather cunning at him as it holds the bun between its teeth.

Angrily, Shizuo points the stick at the dog, and shouts "You stinkin' dog! I wish you were gone!"

To his utter surprise, the dog vanishes in a puff of smoke, leaving behind his saliva-soaked bun and a very dumbfounded him. Nearly six minutes pass before Shizuo's miniature brain can register the info, and afterwards, he realizes that there's something _very unusual_ about the stick.

Shizuo ignores his disgusting bun as he walks away with the object, carefully holding it in his hand with eyes glued to it and mind no longer remembering work. He assumes people are still staring at him because they think the stick is weird too, but in fact they are horrified by the trail of blood running down from his forehead.

* * *

Nearly all day, Shizuo walked around with the funny-looking stick, trying to figure out what it was. He didn't care about the dog, didn't feel hungry as curiosity overrode his senses. Shizuo spent time pointing the thing at objects, people and plants, saying random words until he started using the phrase "I wish...". Whenever he did, whatever he wished for happened.

No matter what it was.

A tree became enormous. A motorbike transformed into a bicycle. A man's beard reached down to his feet. A baby stopped crying. A building changed its color. A bird became a plane. Three kids gained a playmate. Chocolate cake appeared on his hand.

By the afternoon, Shizuo managed to discover that this object was in fact, a magic wand.

It wasn't until sunset did an evil idea pop up in his head. He can ask for anything using this wand. He can make people disappear, people he hates, namely Izaya. Though why stop there? He could make the man tiny, turn him into a flea. He could even make the man nicer. He could even (if he felt it would make a difference) turn him into a girl.

Would he be pretty as a girl?

Shizuo begins grinning quite menacingly once these thoughts cross his mind, and people start staring at him again as a result. He now looks even scarier than before. Without saying a word, Shizuo holds the wand tightly, as he marches over to Shinjuku, intending to test it out more on the informant he so **loves**.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No need to fill my head with ideas, I already have part 2 planned out, though of course, I won't stop you if you really want me to try some things out. XD


	2. Poor Izaya

It felt tiring to say that one phrase over and over again, despite the beauty of having said it as he held the magic wand. The walk to Shinjuku was long, so Shizuo decided to play around with the stick a bit more. Of course, he made certain no one saw him as he spoke out his wish, and changed something of the place, or else he would cause himself great trouble.

Doing so would certainly gain him a new reputation, besides 'Ikebukuro's monster'.

One dog's fur got turned yellow, while a woman's mini-skirt got turned long. She was strangely angry about that. Feeling his throat getting dry, Shizuo hoped for an alternative way of casting the spells. So, with his wand (secretly) pointed at a parked car, he turned the whole thing into a bus without making a sound.

This was how Shizuo discovered he could say the phrase in his head.

It was a brilliant discovery. This will enable him to cast spells or cause havoc without getting caught, without drawing suspicion. He believes he already has done so back in Ikebukuro, but with his current target on his mind, all he cares about is _not_ how to deal with his mistake back home, but making Izaya suffer...once and for all.

Humiliate him, if he may add.

With the sadistic grin back on his face, Shizuo widens his steps as he gets closer to where he really wants to be. Any witnesses of his mischief will be dealt with later.

* * *

 

Standing at the front door of his target, Shizuo doesn't care that he's feeling rather exhausted from the fast walk, doesn't mind that his heart is racing from pure excitement. He doesn't think to consider that he is about to play dirty.

It takes one knock for Shizuo to realize he doesn't need anyone to answer to him. He can simply use the wand's power to gain access. Through the use of the wand pointed at the door, and the words spoken in his head, Shizuo manages to fling the door open, startling Izaya who was on his way over.

It probably _was_ a good idea to knock first.

Mainly because...the look on Izaya's face is priceless. Years of knowing the man and not once has he shown a face so hilarious, that it makes the whole trip feel not at all tiring, but extremely worth it. Shizuo visibly chuckles, and this forces Izaya to send him a frown, with eyes glaring daggers and screaming death at him as he takes a few steps into the office.

From what he can see, there is no one else here. **Perfect.** Izaya was also on his computer chair judging by how it has been pushed back. The man was probably in the middle of wrecking someone's life, or getting hired to do so. Shizuo definitely feels proud from having intruded on his work. He highly doubts what he is about to do can be considered cruel, not when it involves Izaya.

More like, sweet revenge.

Shizuo was wise enough to hide the wand behind his back, the length of it being slightly shorter than his forearm. Bringing his hand away from his lips, Shizuo takes the angry look on Izaya's face as a challenge.

"Evening, Izaya."

He says, and just for the record, this is the first time Shizuo has ever spoken words of greeting towards the other man. Obviously, this causes Izaya to look perplexed.

"Shizu-chan~ I don't remember inviting you to my place."

...yet he dare smiles.

Instead of growling like a beast or preparing his fists to wipe that smug look off, Shizuo restrains himself and shows a confident smile, as he takes another step forward. He won't act the way Izaya wants him to. No. He's going to show him that TWO can play nasty.

"I don't need an invite. I just need you to stand still."

Izaya raises an eyebrow, but this mild look of confusion doesn't cover up the gleam of hate in those reddish orbs, which Shizuo can easily see. It doesn't bother him how much Izaya hates his character, so long as he can get him back anyway he wants. He never really thought about punishing Izaya, since he never did succeed, but now he can win.

He _will_ win.

So the tables shall be turned.

"Why would I-"

Shizuo cuts him off with a quick phrase in his head, and the end of the wand pointing directly - and within both their sights - at Izaya. What he wished for this time is for Izaya to become paralyzed on the spot, unable to move, unable to jerk according to his will. Only the parts controlled by his body are able to make any sort of movement.

Izaya's eyes widen at both the sudden restriction and the object Shizuo is pointing at him; a funny looking stick probably made of ice. It did cross Shizuo's mind to wish for the wand to become invisible, but he's too worried he'll lose it once he can't see it himself, so he's taking the risk of letting Mr. Know-It-All see how he's going to be torture.

Shizuo could probably erase his memory afterwards.

Not wanting to let those parting lips say anything, Shizuo casts another spell, and the attempt to make any sound fails. Shizuo has turned the overly-talkative informant mute. It's sad how he won't be able to hear any cries of distress from Izaya this way, which would be quite nice to listen to.

Following the shock, Izaya glares suspiciously at Shizuo, his body frozen and his ability to argue, complain and even insult have been completely removed. He must realize this is magic, or that this blond is a wizard and not the usually-rowdy Heiwajima Shizuo he so loves to torment.

With the same, dark grin he held back at Ikebukuro and on the way to Shinjuku, Shizuo prepares for the grand moment.

'I wish he was small.'

Laughter echoes throughout the large office when the 25 year-old informant finds himself suddenly the size of a child, no taller than Shizuo's lower leg. Awkwardly, Shizuo failed to expect the informant's clothes not to shrink with him, so Izaya frantically tries to hide in the pile he hardly fits in, doing so by kneeling down and revealing only his head...a head red with angry and embarrassment.

It takes nearly two minutes for Shizuo to calm down. He's quite tempted to pick the informant up now he's like this, but as he was going to, memories of Izaya's mischief stop him and make him wish for another thing.

He makes the informant smaller.

As the body shrinks even further, becoming impossible to see from under all he was wearing, Shizuo quickly wishes for his voice to come back, believing he would not hear the informant's usual taunts. What he hears as the tall, young man becomes tiny is a wail, a childish, high-pitched wail.

Shizuo walks over and reaches in for the other, feeling a bit disgusted when he accidently touches the black boxers. When he feels something, it's the feeling of a bite.

He becomes pissed off by this.

Stepping back, Shizuo - now with a frown - points the wand at the pile and wishes...

'I wish for Izaya to return to his original size.'

In an instant, Izaya is back to his normal height, his clothes coming back on perfectly, as if he had never shrunk...

...to the size of a flea.

Izaya shakes his head and rubs his limbs upon return, before glaring furiously at Shizuo. Shizuo can only look back at him with a bored expression.

"Shizu-chan! How dare you! What do you think-"

It's obvious what he's about to say, so Shizuo cuts him off sharply.

"Revenge."

The moment Izaya's eyes widen, in what Shizuo hopes is horror, another wish is made, and Izaya's clothes enlarge. Truly, the sound of Izaya's voice is so irritating. Not while he was becoming smaller but, when he's himself he's a real pain simply by saying a few words if not just one word.

As anticipated, the clothes fall off, every last piece. It makes Shizuo wonder just what kind of monster he is now.

"Shi~Shi...SHIZUO!!!"

Izaya's face returns to bloody red upon finding himself naked thanks to his bloody rival. Shizuo continues to look bored, but inside he feels utter joy, and not just because he's made the other look completely helpless, but he also finally got to hear his real name said by the other.

Izaya is trembling, undeniably horrified by the other's cruel, yet justifiable actions. His body is honestly trembling despite only his mouth being under his control. Shizuo laughs as the sight fills him up with pleasure. The monster is finally in control of things.

"AT LEAST...let me wear my underwear."

Izaya's voice is cracking, a clear sign that this is indeed too much for him, but somehow not enough for Shizuo. However, out of the goodness and decency of his heart, Shizuo summons back the underwear to its former place. It's not that Shizuo was enjoying the sight. Actually, he was trying _not_ to pay attention to that area.

It would be real low for him if he did take notice.

The twitch in those hands tell Shizuo that, Izaya dreadfully wants to grab onto those boxers and hold them there, as an attempt to save himself some dignity, though it's not like Shizuo is planning to spare him any.

Cheeks still colored, Izaya's biggest weapon is to glare at him, hate boiling in those orbs and making them appear truly red.

Shizuo thinks of another prank, and while turning the man into a female does cross his mind again, he decides to brush it off. As a man of good moral, he's becoming awfully scared of tainting his own heart with very bad behavior. Sure, Izaya deserves punishment and is a bad guy who is impossible to forgive, but Shizuo is not bad and won't follow the other's footsteps, at least, not all the way, and not beyond today.

He's not sure if he wants to keep this thing.

Izaya remains agitated and terrified (not that he'll admit it) as the wand soon comes back to pointing at him, and when he sees nothing happen, he tries to voice his wonder, only to let out a...

"Meow."

Shizuo literally drops onto the floor, laughing, loudly, an excellent example of the word "ROFL". The wand slips from his hand as he tries so hard to hold his stomach and possibly prevent it from getting cramps and aches. Even with the thing close by, Izaya's immobilized body can't do a thing to obtain it, and he can only glare viciously at it.

"Meow."

His second attempt at speaking only worsens Shizuo's condition. Wait, he's actually crying tears of joy from this! Then suddenly, Izaya can't feel his ears where they should to be, and notices an extra limb he can move just above his rear. He's unable to find where his ears are, but when he swings the limb over to the front, citizens on the streets watch as a dozen windows get smashed by a scream alone.

Most of them can only assume it was by a _really_ big cat.

A pair of black feline ears and a long, smooth, cat tail is now on Izaya's body, is now a part of Izaya and are the cause for Shizuo's insanely nerve-racking laughter. For anyone else, he might look adorable rolling around in total bliss, but to Izaya who is also the man's victim, he couldn't be more furious.

It takes quite a long while for Shizuo to _forcibly_ halt his laughter, realizing it is starting to hurt and it won't remain amusing if he leaves Izaya hissing at him. **Hissing.** Sitting up, Shizuo smiles brightly at the dark aura-cloaked being before him and, after wiping away a few cold tears, he speaks.

"Did you call me just now, Izayan~?"

Izaya visibly snaps, and in an instant hurls a thousand insults Shizuo's way, combining smart words with childish ones simply to vent out how insulted he feels, since his mouth is all he can use. Apparently, intense anger can break the spell, yet Izaya keeps it up without knowing he can speak human again. Unlike last time, Shizuo responds calmly to the loud shouting, shown when he reaches for the wand and, by picking it up, silences Izaya immediately.

He didn't even need to make a wish.

Smart guy.

Izaya looks at the man with fear in his eyes, the hate now replaced with an emotion more logical for the situation. Shizuo happily points it at the informant, the wand which has brought him so much entertainment. Dangling it a bit, Shizuo thinks of something before breaking the silence again.

"'An inexperienced man'? The hell you mean by that?" They both know what he meant. "Should I change that somehow?" Shizuo's smile turns wicked, and Izaya can tell. "...want to help me?"

Regardless if a spell is keeping him still, those mere words paralyze Izaya on their own. Of course, Shizuo means it as a joke, but the shy look in Izaya's eyes that have suddenly appeared, make Shizuo wonder if the other is not the playboy he claimed himself to be in high school.

"Hey Izaya," Shizuo snaps the other out of his long line of imaginative possibilities. "I wish for you to tell me the truth. Have you ever done it with anyone?"

Izaya's jaw quivers before words unable to resist coming out, come out.

"No, never."

Fully trusting the wand's abilities, Shizuo does not deny Izaya's most recent statement.

Though what to do about that? This only proves Izaya has been lying all these years. Does it really matter that he has never slept with anyone before? To Shizuo, this would mean they share something in common, which really is amazing considering how, besides this, they do NOT share anything in common.

Izaya continues to look disturbed, uncomfortable, and so not like the man he grew up knowing. With a straight face, Shizuo gets up from the floor, and removes the cat spell along with the binding spell.

That night, Shizuo does not return to Ikebukuro.

 


End file.
